


Come and Wash Away the Pain

by tioupfic



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: (i guess but it's for pain management), Chronic Pain, Disabled Crowley, Drug Use, Hurt/Comfort, attempts at pain management, author has chronic pain, i'll add more tags as i do this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-30
Updated: 2019-06-29
Packaged: 2020-05-30 22:40:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19412869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tioupfic/pseuds/tioupfic
Summary: Crowley has chronic pain from the Fall. Aziraphale does some research and they try out various /human/ treatments.





	1. Chapter 0

**Author's Note:**

> i live for disabled crowley and how so many of us saw his Chronic Pain Walk(tm) and went "yeah. that me." 
> 
> oops i went back to regina spektor lyric titles ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

“You know, dear boy, I’ve been doing some reading,” Aziraphale said from where he saw on Crowley’s stupid couch. 

“I’m abssolutley fucking surprised. Another?” 

Aziraphale sighed and reached over to the bottle of whiskey on the table. He had only recently learned the Fall, for this particular demon, had resulted in 6000 years of chronic, sometimes unbearable pain. When Crowley had finally admitted this – and that too, only because some ineffable happenstances essentially pinned him into a corner – it had been the most heartbreaking conversation of Aziraphale’s life, infinitely worse than Adam and Eve or the Metatron. 

Crowley was currently stretched out with his legs over the angel’s lap; he’d been planning to just get wasted until the pain that was consuming his back and legs subsided. Then the angel had shown up to tell him something, and hey, free leg massage. 

“Is it really wise to get drunk every time it, you know, flashes on?” 

“Flares up?”

“Ah! Yes, quite.”

“Wise, nah. But what have I ever done that was wise, eh?” The demon took a deep drink from his glass. “Can you get back to it?” he vaguely motioned to his legs. 

“Of course,” Aziraphale responded, massaging his perfectly manicured hands into tense muscles. “So, as I was saying, I’ve been reading a bit about how humans cope with chronic pain. I thought we might try some of them.” 

“’S’not gonna work, angel, do you think I’ve never experimented with laudanum before?”” Even though Aziraphale couldn’t see Crowley’s face, he knew it was pulled into a sarcastic expression. 

“Not laudanum, dear boy, really they’ve made quite some progress. Look, I’ve made you a list!” he produced a neatly folded piece of paper covered in his perfect handwriting and handed it over. “I was thinking we might try these out and see what works.” 

“Ngh,” Crowley groaned and handed the paper back. “Read it to me.” 

“Oh, of course,” Aziraphale read the long list. 

“Yeah, all right. Some of those don’t sound half bad,” Crowley agreed. 

“Lovely! Then, I know what you’re thinking, ‘hope my angel brought number 4’ and you’d be right my dear,” Aziraphale carefully removed a pair of joints from his waistcoat pocket. “Care for a light?”

“Oh, thank fuck, yes.” 

AZIRAPHALE’S LIST OF WAYS TO HELP CROWLEY, BASED ON THOROUGH RESEARCH:  
1\. PHYSICAL THERAPY  
2\. TRANSCUTANEOUS ELECTRICAL NERVE STIMULATION  
3\. HEATING PAD  
4\. MARIJUANA   
5\. GLUTEN/DAIRY-FREE DIET (THOUGH HE DOESN’T EAT MUCH ANYWAY)  
6\. CORTISONE INJECTION   
7\. HOT BATH WITH EPSOM SALTS (PICK A NICE SCENT)  
8\. MASSAGE  
9\. GARLIC PASTE (SOUNDS DOUBTFUL BUT MIGHT WORK)  
10\. REDUCE ALCOHOL CONSUMPTION (SO SORRY TO SAY)  
11\. OBTAIN PREDNISONE   
12\. FISH OIL SUPPLIMENTS  
13\. ANTIDEPRESSANTS (THEY HAVE BEEN SHOWN TO REDUCE BACK PAIN)  
14\. ACUPUNCTURE  
15\. ACCUPRESSURE   
16\. REMEMBER THAT I LOVE YOU VERY, VERY MUCH AND I WILL HELP YOU


	2. Chapter Pot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry the chapters here are so short. i'm gonna try to be fast if i have enough spoons.

“Dunno why, every time I get crossfaded makes me wanna take off my clothes,” Crowley slurred as he laid back down on the couch, now shirtless. 

“I do recall you gave some people quite the show once in the 60s.” 

“What can I say, I lit’rlly invented body positivity.” 

“Hm, you know, I’m still confused why you thought that was a bad deed,” Aziraphale commented. “In all honesty, it made me feel rather good.”

“Vaaaaaanity, angel. It’s about the vanity.”

“Hm,” Aziraphale hummed dismissively. “I still rather like it.” 

“Yeah, well, fuck Gabriel.” 

They lounged like this for a while, sometimes talking idly, sometimes in silence. Aziraphale felt that he had done an excellent job at loosening the muscles that had been so tight before. But then, before he could feel too proud of himself, he realized he had forgotten to bring food. And the munchies were setting in. 

“My dear, may I ask a simple favor of you? You won’t have to get up at all.”

“Mm,” Crowley hummed languidly. “What is it?”

“Can you use your phone and order us some food? I’m quite peckish, and I know you don’t keep food here.”

“Oh, yeah. Phone’s in the bedroom.” 

“Thank you.” Aziraphale retrieved Crowley’s cellphone, briefly noticed that the sheets on his bed were in absolute disarray, and handed the phone over. Since Crowley was still fairly indifferent about what they ate, Aziraphale requested barramundi en papillote with a galette for dessert. Crowley rolled his eyes fondly and put in the order. Normally fancy French restaurants don’t deliver, but miraculously this one was trying out a new system. 

The food arrived shortly, and Aziraphale brought it back to the couch. 

“Come, can you sit up?” 

Crowley sighed and laboriously shifted himself into a semi-comfortable sitting position. Aziraphale opened the food and the warm, citrus smell of the fish filled the air. ‘Peaceful,’ Aziraphale thought to himself. Even Crowley was looking interested. Aziraphale smiled when the demon actually ate; he had chosen something light in hopes that he could get Crowley to eat at all. 

The dish was delicious. The dessert was phenomenal; again, even Crowley ate his share. Aziraphale felt a warmth wash over him. He knew apple was the right choice. 

He set both empty containers on the table and glanced over at Crowley. The demon seemed relaxed, maybe even contented. 

“How are you feeling, dear?” 

Crowley turned his head, almost surprised that Aziraphale had asked him. “Still hurts, but I think I can ignore it a little better now. Don’t think I can walk much farther than the bedroom though.” There was a brief hint of frustration on his face, but it faded quickly. 

“What about the bathroom?”

Crowley’s neutral expression broke into one of sarcasm and confusion. “What about the bathroom? Angel, the bathroom is connected to the bedroom, how many times have you stayed over?” 

Aziraphale laughed softly. If his demon was able to mock him with some energy, he was certainly feeling a bit better. “Ah, what I meant was, I’d like to run you a hot bath. I don’t have epsom salts, I’m afraid, but it might still relax your body and help you sleep better. I – I fear you haven’t been sleeping well.” 

Crowley was silent for some time before he responded. 

“You… don’t have to. You don’t have to care for me. I know how hard it is… how hard I can be.” 

Aziraphale’s face fell. “My dear,” he said, eyebrows knitted together. “I…I…you’re not…you’re so easy to care for… here, can you focus enough to read this line?” 

He pulled out his list of things to try and pointed to line 16: remember that I love you very, very much and I will help you. 

He watched Crowley’s eyes reach the end of the line before he spoke again. 

“It’s easy to care for you. What’s hard is to know you’re suffering alone, that you’ve suffered alone for so long.” The angel paused and reached his hand up to stroke Crowley’s cheek tenderly. “That you’ve never let yourself be cared for.” 

“Ok,” Crowley sighed. “Ok, if you really want to-“ 

“I want to,” Aziraphale insisted firmly, with a finality that said ‘this conversation is over, I’m taking care of you whether you want me to or not.’ 

“You might have to help me up then,” Crowley both admitted and conceded. 

“Gladly, my dear,” Aziraphale beamed as he offered a supporting arm.

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. i'm a broke-ass law student and i can't afford my meds + anything fancier than ramen. i googled "what do fancy people eat" and did my best. i just couldn't quite picture az eating the sloppy stoner food i eat lmao.   
> 2\. az's list is half bullshit. but i do recommend the TENS unit if your spinal cord sucks like mine.


End file.
